sunset
and still, my ripples
entertwine yours
after this dragon-ride
the ecstasy of rest
I hosting over at dVerse, where we write Jisei (Japanese Death Poems). The pub is open! Come join us!
“sunset…” a #jisey (11/19/20)
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Comments
23 responses to ““sunset…” a #jisey (11/19/20)”
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Beautiful.
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Intertwining ripples are a lovely visual for how life and death share with each other.
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So like the play between stillness and movement – trembling – in this. The comma after ‘still’ – is like both a breath and a joining with the other – life/death – day/night – lover/lover. After that the poem rushes on to the final ‘rest’.
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Oh! This is lovely, Frank! Exquisite.
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A stunning tanka, Frank. I love the way it starts with sunset, the ending of a day, and ends with the ecstasy of rest – and the intertwining of ripples.
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I made a poem on my mother’s death in haiku/senryu style. Check out this link to read it: https://peterbouchier.wordpress.com/english-essays-and-poems-2/ma/
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Water is just right to show how both life and death exist together, (k)
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I think the invocation of sunset as a symbol of the end of life is very powerful. But you’ve written this in such a way that your words could apply as well as life as to death. Skilfully done!
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And dat’s why you is da Haikai Master! My hat’s off, frank. Thanks.
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Very cool, for the reasons given by Peter Frankis, and for being as much a love poem as a traditional death poem. Life as a dragon-ride! And I love the feel/sound of “ecstasy of rest”.
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“Sunset” and “dragon-ride” are a great pairing, with the warm glow of life in mind.
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Dragon-ride describes life well these days, I love how you ended your piece with calm.
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I love your poem Frank. The idea of our ripples still having affect long after we are gone is encouraging to me.
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I love the still beauty of death here. Lovely!
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Wow Frank this is splendid!
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A dragon ride – how wonderful!
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Life can indeed be a dragon ride and the intertwining ripples show the connection with another before the inevitable end. Just exquisite!
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Frank- what a beautiful Jisei.
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Ecstacy of rest… this is what I already feel every evening.
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Lovely, Frank!
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Your poem is a lovely evocation of love and the entwining of souls on into unknown futures.
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A beautiful jisei Frank, hope you are safe and well 🙏
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Frank J. Tassone 
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